Celluloid #147

In Theaters


Damsels in Distress (2012) Stillman - This was my first taste of Wilt Stillman and initially I really didn't like it. This film reminds me very much of another talky white person film called Kicking and Screaming by Noah Baumbach which I hated. However, as this film progressed, I got accustomed to the rhythm of the stilted too-clever dialogue, but still didn't care very much for the story. Some saving graces for me were the dancing scenes - the tap dancing and line dancing in particular. 3/5

the Five-Year Engagement (2012) Stoller - I'm not normally one to go in for romantic comedies, but there's been such a dearth of offerings at the theater that I caved for this one. Unfortunately, this one certainly did not transcend its genre. The movie meanders quite a bit, doesn't have enough charm or laughs, and the characters make bad decisions in a way that doesn't exactly cause you to root for them. It wasn't terrible, but I think will prove to be totally forgettable. 2.5/5

In Home


the Falls (1980) Greenaway - I appreciate Greenaway's sensibilities on full display in this strange mockumentary chronicling a group of people whose last names all start with F-A-L-L. Each person is suffering from disorders related to an apocalyptic event, and these disorder often seem to center around birds in some way. I enjoyed the style and the content, but three hours is two hours too many. 3/5

Sins of the Fleshapoids (1965) Kuchar - the Kuchars reveled in B-cinema glory. This film looks pretty shitty, but in a bizarro campy way, and has an enjoyable story at its heart. In the distant future, humans have human-like servant robots called fleshapoids. Eventually one of these fleshapoids becomes fed up with his role, rebels against his master, causes chaos, and falls in love. 4/5

Celluloid #146

In Theaters


John Carter (2012) Stanton - I know this film was a huge flop, but I really don't think it was too bad for what it is - a PG-13 sci-fi adventure. It conjures up Star Wars, Gladiator/Cleopatra. John Carter is a rogue civil war soldier who get accidentally transported to Mars through a gold cave. While on Mars, he is taken hostage, but he can jump incredible lengths and appears to be much stronger than the martians (I think this is supposed to be as a result of the difference in gravity). He takes interest in a princess and tries to help her save her people from a rival tribe. 3/5

the Hunger Games (2012) Ross - In the future, society will be dealing with a food shortage, but will still be very much into reality television. There are twelve districts that surround a capital who every year hosts "The Hunger Games", a televised fight to the death between 24 teenagers. Each district holds a drawing to see which male and female between the ages of 12 & 18 will represent their district. Katniss is our protagonist, and is the female "tribute" from District 12, the poorest district. She is accompanied by Peeta, a boy who has crushed on her for years. Because she is from the poorest district, she is already quite adept at hunting for survival. I know many people have criticized this film for being too close to Battle Royale, but I have to say that I enjoyed both films, even if I found them both to be a little slight. I have no desire to read the books, but I can safely say that I will see the sequel. 3.5/5

the Kid With a Bike (2011) Dardenne - The Dardenne brothers are always dealing with bleak subjects in a naturalistic way. This film is much less bleak than some of their others - a kid, Cyril, has been dropped off at a home/boarding school full of troubled youth. He finds out that his dad has moved and realizes that his dad has not only sold his beloved bike, but has essentially abandoned him. Fortunately, a hairdresser, Samantha, agrees to let Cyril stay with her on the weekends. Her character is quite amazing to watch. 4.5/5

In Home


Last Night (1998) McKellar - The movie opens with only 6 hours until the end of the world. One guy is trying to fulfill all of his sexual fantasies. Others are looting and overturning cars. Patrick spends part of the evening with his family in a re-enactment of Christmas, but wants to be at his own home when the end happens. He lets a woman looking for her husband use the phone and ends up spending his last hours helping her out. Not everything is explained, and that's perfectly fine by me. 3.5/5

Scott Pilgrim vs. the World (2010) Wright - Pretty silly and gimmicky film where Scott has to battle Ramona's seven ex-boyfriends Street Fighter-style in order to date her. This film is supposed to feel very hyper like a video game. There's enough fun and cleverness to sustain the first half to two-thirds of the film, but by the time we have to deal with Jason Schwartzmann as the villain, I had grown bored. 3/5